Saturday, May 20, 2006

Postpartum Issues

Wow, I forget how gross the postpartum period sure takes a long time to get back to where I was...and after every baby my body seems to get worse. But, my kids...are worth it!! Small price to pay.

My Issues:
My gross varicose vein leg/s - awaiting a vascular surgeon to chat about the next step for my grandpa/dad leg. It looks like an old man leg! My daughter Catie pokes my veins...and I cannot stand that. I should post a ain't pretty. The veins got worse with each pregnancy. I started with no veins, and ended up with a brutal looking leg.

My stomach - is awful looking. Even when I "SUCK IT IN" it looks like I am about 4-5 months pregnant still.

My posture - what posture? I used to sit up so straight and carry myself so nicely. Now I hunch over like a little old lady. I have to remember to suck in the big tummy and hold my head up high. That seems to take off about 10 pounds visually. My swollen feet and legs - not so bad anymore, but they are there sometimes. It took 1 week + to get back to normal (able to see my ankle bones)

My head - well...some nasties there. More grey hairs, forgetfulness, a bad highlight incident days before Caroline was born. What else? Headaches and eye aches from looking down at my daughter as she feeds. Ummm...oh yeah. Black hairs growing in a little round patch under my chin. My sisters discovered a few of them back when I was pregnant with Cameron. They pointed them out to me and I cried. And wow, they are worse now...time for some electrolysis! I am tired of plucking and waxing. Even worse when my kids rub them...gross. Don't I sound so lovely...LOL. What else bugs me? Oh teeth. I want to whiten them up again. My skin doesn't look so glowing anymore. I have lost the glow in my face, and I look really tired all of the time. And, my frown marks are very pronounced now. And because of lack of sleep bags under my eyes.

Oh yes...breasts...after breastfeeding for many years on and off...I don't really need to describe the state of my chest, but let me say "the girls" are not so great as they once were in my "prime." I think a lift will be in order. And, wearing hideous nursing bras don't help my situation either. Thank goodness for really good bras afterwards! Another part of breast area is breastfeeding...thankfully I have milk to feed 10 babies, but I don't like the letdown/leaking part of feeding. I despise the breastpads that show up through my shirts. Thankfully there are Lilypads for that...and I don't like smelling like stinky dried up milk and spit ups. I know I will breastfeed for about 1 year! I am glad I can do that for Caroline!

Stretch marks?! Well thankfully I only have a few around my hip area, and a couple of little ones on my tummy. But not really visible. Only to me I think. And if Cliff were to say something he would get in trouble LOL.

Just my physical body size freaks me out. I always gain the same amount of weight with each of the 5 of my pregnancies. About 40 pounds. I have only lost 17 of the 40 and I am going to have to work my but off to get back to where I feel good about myself. I cannot wait to start running again...the countdown is on...3 more weeks until the 6 week mark! Yippee. I am sick of my fat round face, too close together eyes with black bags under the. The jiggly midsection and fat arms...yuck. I see myself in photos and I cringe. I even ripped some photos up of myself so that I don't have to remember this time of my postpartum body. All I know is that I don't like weighing more than my husband. That really sucks.

So there you go, and honest peek into my brain about how I feel about my postpartum body. And the amazing thing about having a baby is that, even though I have felt like this gross fat yuck postpartum Mom, I have ALWAYS gotten over it, and gone on do this 5 times to my body. That is the beauty of becoming a Mom. You get over it, and create and deliver a beautiful, perfect little baby...and all of the postpartum stuff is not so bad. It is only such a short time until it is all forgotten again. Until the next time. But for me, this is the last time I will need to go through all of this again.